I'll Whisper Quietly, I'll Give You Nothing but Truth.

Hi guys!

I'm blogging now cause I'm bored and I'm sitting here waiting doing nothing.

So, WHY NOT! hahaha

Life has been busy lately.

With uni and et cetra.

Well not so much uni, since I skip classes all the goddamn time .__.

Every weekend I tell myself, ok next week, I WILL attend a full week of lectures + tutorials.

Yeaaaahhhhhhh, that doesn't work out very well.

But honestly the only reason I feel shity about skipping classes is cause of my attendance record.

I don't think I would actually give the situation two fcks if my attendance didn't matter for me to take exams.

Sigh life is hard ~

Anyhoo! I kind of like uni life.

Miss my college friends, cause we were quite a tight knitted family.

But in uni it's like you're in different classes with different people.

AND FOR SOME REASON, all my class mates are from Foundation.

So they all know each other and are pretty close.

And that kinds of leaves me, alone.

That sadly makes me sounds so antisocial.

It's not that I don't want to make friends.

I just don't really see the point I guess?

Like I know these people are just going to be hi-bye friends (or at least most of them)

that I won't really be keeping in touch with once we're not in the same classes anymore.

:(

So I hang out with Andrew and people from his year.

As always, me hanging out with people who are not directly related to me in a way.

And when they graduate a year earlier than me, I'll be all alone, AS ALWAYS.

I really need to start making friends, don't I?

till then, xx!

This Clock Never Seemed So Alive.

Blessed.

xx.

And You Make Me Feel Right, Child Like.

So here comes the explanation post for my crappy posts lately.

So I recently went through a break up.

Yeah.

I honestly have come to terms with it albeit the crazy tipsy/drunk post before this.

I'll admit, I was sad, hurt, in pain.

Every single word that could mean sad, that I was.

I mean come on, who wouldn't be sad after a break up?

Well there's the party that initiated it, but the others like me, would be rather down in the dumps.

Especially if you took the relationship seriously.

But what are you going to do?

What is the point of sitting there and sulking 24/7?

Would it make any difference?

Would it change things?

Would it change his mind?

Would it make you feel better?

NO.

I'm making a turn for the better now.

I realized that I don't need anyone who doesn't need me.

I don't need anyone who thinks I am a burden.

I don't need anyone who doesn't love me.

The yennator deserves better.

She deserves someone who would not give up on her.

Someone who would not walk out when things got hard.

And I know I'll find that someone in the future.

Of course it sucks.

Honestly, he passes my mind a thousand times a day.

I'm not even kidding.

We've done so much, that almost everything I do reminds me of him.

I miss the good times, I really do.

And I wished we had more and I expected us to have more.

But that's not going to happen.

So now when things remind me of him, I just say it out, and laugh to myself. 

It was after all a good memory.

It's been slightly more than a week.

And I can honestly say I'm proud of myself, of my progress.

I couldn't have done this alone.

Friends are like the most essential thing about recovery.

I guess this is what people mean when they say "bros over hoes" and stuff like that.

(idk what's the girl version, chicks before dicks? LOL)

When you're in a shitty place like I was, you know who your true friends really are.

Cause they'd be the only one willing to get down and dirty to pull you up from the deep dark hole you're in.

I cannot express how much I appreciate everything every single one of them has done for me.

From those who just sent me a simple "cheer up" message to those who listened and got me back on track,

I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU ALL!

♥♥♥

Special shoutout to Kristie, Andrew, Manesh, Zak and Ivor.

These few here, have been amazing.

AMAZING.

I cannot ask for more :)

Andrew, my amazing amazing LIKE CANNOT MORE AMAZING best friend/hubby.

He's a blessing.

Been through quite a lot of shit/adventures in the past 3 years.

Thanks so much love, 5 hearts for you!

♥♥♥♥♥

This here is Manesh.

Big tall Indian boy.

A retard but one of the best :)

I sadly do not have any recent pictures with the rest of them.

But I still love you all nonetheless hehe!

You will start doubting everything.

Every moment you've been through. 

Wondering if it was all a lie all along.

I'll be honest, I haven't figured that part out yet.

But I'll get there.

It really is.

And it's going to hurt like fuuuuckkkkk.

I know it hurt me.

To see how easy he's taking it.

But then I realized if he can do it, so can I.

If he can be happy without me, so can I.

So can you.

Like I've said already, if he's so sure he's happy without you, so be it.

You deserve to be happy too.

You deserve to let it go and move on.

Everything in this world happens for a reason.

Maybe it's happening so the next time, you will appreciate the moments more?

Or you will be more cautious?

Whatever it is, God doesn't throw things that you can't handle to you.

It's all a part of life.

Maybe God has a bigger plan in store for you than you had for yourself :)

For anyone of you who are actually going through this, here's a piece of advice.

IT WILL GET BETTER.

I know you probably feel like it won't.

And when all hope is gone, what do you hold onto?

You hold onto yourself, my dear.

You may not know this now, but you're stronger than this, you're better than this.

Hold your head up high and smile, cause the world is missing that beautiful smile of yours.

Why be sad over someone who has hurt you so much, who does NOT deserve a single tear of yours.

You WILL get over this and when you do, nothing will feel better,

than to look back for that one last time to see how much you've changed.

If so many other people can do this, so can you.

So never give up.

This dentist story here, was sent to me by Kristie.

And it cannot be more true.

Remember when you think you can't do it, YOU CAN.

Tomorrow will be a better day.

It really will be.

I update my tumblr more often these days, simply because it's easier to just reblog pictures haha.

'till then, xx.

And It's Taken Me This Long.

Hey everybody.

I'm kind of tipsy/drunk right now from too much wine,

so I'll be blogging.

Since I can't tweet comfortably without people judging me,

and since no one reads this anyway.

I have so many reasons to be mad at you and to hate you.

You broke my heart.

As simple as that, you broke the utmost important thing I gave to you.

I've always said love is giving the other person the chance to break you but trusting them not to.

I guessed I trusted the wrong person.

Cause you clearly broke me.

You were just a bored out of town guy right?

You never loved me.

Because once you start loving, you don't just stop.

Because you don't destroy the person you love.

You lied to me.

Told me you loved me for the past month plus,

when you didn't feel that way.

Was everything a lie too?

Was the past 9 months a lie too?

You told me you'd never leave me.

Nothing but lies.

You hurt me.

"You're a burden."

"I don't love you anymore."

If there's a way to hurt someone to the core, those two phrases would be it.

Who tells someone that they're a burden?

You just don't say things like that, much more to a person who you claimed you "used" to love.

What would you know right?

You don't hurt. You decided to stop loving me, you decided to give up.

What did you go through? What do you go through?

You don't think of me, cause I don't cross your mind.

When you do things we've done together, I don't cross your mind.
Nothing reminds you of me.

Cause you're happy and making new memories with other people.

I'm glad you're happy but honestly, what have you gone through?

What are you going through that makes you hurt more than me?

I'm the one hurting most.

But no one sees that.

You say you know it's hard.

You don't.

You say you're sorry.

You're not.

.

.

.

Yet after all this crap you put me through,

I still think of you every night before I sleep.

Even when I'm not in the right state of mind.

The scar from you is so deep, it's carved and tattooed forever in my heart. 

xx.

Hurt.

"It wasn't love, it was work."

"So I was like a burden?"

"Yes."

Words I'll never, ever forget.

xx.

Livin' In Sin Is The New Thing.

Hello!

I must say, I love my post title.

It's from 3 by Britney Spears <3 p="">

So what else would I be blogging about other than,

THE ACADEMY AWARDS

Bling bling glitz and glam award shows for actors and actress of the silver screen,

which is more commonly known as the Oscars.

Okay, just to clarify,

the Oscars and the Academy Awards ARE THE SAME THING.

The Oscars is just a more common name for the award show

cause those Golden Statues the actors/actress/director/crew win are called the Oscars.

Anyway, what else would I be talking about other than the Red Carpet!

Amy Adams in Oscar de la Renta.

Jennifer Lawrence in Dior Haute Couture.

This dress was all the rave yesterday.

Honestly, I don't see the big deal.

It's a beautiful piece don't get me wrong, but I don't think it's WOW.

Btw, J Law here won Best Actress for her role in Silver Linings Playbook, so kudos!

Anne Hathaway in Prada.

Okay this dress.

Almost every fashion page is talking about the dress.

From the pointy seam that makes it look like her nipples are sticking out to the apron-y design of the dress.

Poor Anne had wadrobe malfunctions all across the awards seasons, 

at the Critics' Choice Awards, the SAG Awards and also the BAFTAs.

Anne Hathaway decided to change her dress 3 hours prior to the event, from a Valentino to this.

I don't think it's that bad.

Granted, we've seen her in so so so so many gorgeous pieces but it's not that bad.

Her nipples are all the rave though, just google "Anne Hathaway oscars".

The first few articles will all be somehow related to her nipples.

UPDATE : THERE'S EVEN A TWITTER ACCOUNT CREATED FOR HER NIPPLES.

more on her wadrobe malfunctions here.

Okay, nipples aside, she won Best Supporting Actress for her role as the famous Fantine in Les Miz.

I'm so happy she won!

She has always been one of my favourite actresses of all time. 

Loved her since her Princess Diaries days, I still watch the movies till now HEHE.

SO YAY CONGRATULATIONS! *throws confetti*

Amanda Seyfried in Alexander Mcqueen.

One of my favourites of the evening, and by one of my favourite designers!

'nuff said.

Naomi Watts in Giorgio Armani.

LOVED this too!

Charlize Theron in Dior Haute Couture.

Someone is WORKING her short hair.

Robin Roberts in Marc Bouwer.

Love the colour.

It's so fresh considering the Oscars this year seem to be a more pale/black/white coloured one.

Simple with a classy fabric (Y)

Catherine Zeta Jones in Zuhair Murad.

Fashion lovers (like myself heheh) would recognize this is a Zuhair Murad at the first glance.

Fan Bing Bing in Marchesa.

Way to go for Asian pride!

Marchesa; another fav designer.

Kelly Osbourne in Tony Ward Couture.

I LOVE THIS!

So simple yet so elegant.

And not to mention her purple totally adds the pop of colour to the otherwise all black outift.

Jennifer Hudson in Roberto Cavalli.

Another favourite.

LOVE the colour <3 p="">

Louise Roe in Monique Luhuillier.

LOVE LOVE LOVE this dress.

LOVE how it's so classy yet sexy.

Easily top 3 for the evening.

Halle Berry in Versace.

I just had to post this even though I don't really fancy the dress.

I read on 9GAG that Halle Berry went as the Doppler effect HAHA

Oh, TBBT <3 p="">

Jennifer Garner in Gucci.

Looking beautiful in purple.

Another fresh colour of the night.

Salma Hayek.

Another favourite!

I realized all my favourite dresses are somehow oriental designed o_o

That's how Asian I am.

Well okay.

Sandra Bullock in Elie Saab.

What would an award show be without an Elie Saab dress hahaha.

Stacy Keibler in Naeem Khan.

One of my favourites as well.

p/s for those who don't know who she is, she's George Clooney's infamous girlfriend.

Jenna Dewan in Reem Acra.

The preggers Jenna went with Channing Tatum (her hubby) <3 p="">

Kristen Stewart in Reem Acra.

Samantha Barks in Valentino.

Samantha Barks aka Eponine for Les Miz.

This dress is really really simple, but yet really appealing to me.

The power of classics.

THAT IS ALL FOR THE RED CARPET!

BUT WAIT. THERE'S MORE! (well a little more)

Amanda Seyfried in Givenchy with Samantha Barks and Eddie Redmayne 

during the Les Miz musical performance.

Loving Anne Hathaway's dress here!

Okay that's it.

One final Oscars picture, 

L-R : Daniel Day Lewis (Best Actor), JLaw (Best Actress), Anne Hathaway (Best Supporting Actress), Christoph Waltz (Best Supporting Actor).

Congratulations to all winners! :)

'till then, xx.

Forever Young.

note :

I'm not trying to sell myself wise.

The following is just my view and take on a certain subject.

Which I thought of last night while watching New Girl.

Love that show.

--

As you readers already know (or not know? o.o), I use song lyrics as titles for my blog posts.

And today's title cannot be more suitable for the contents of my blog post today.

I'm going to be talking about,

GROWING OLD.

The age thing never really mattered to me, in fact I enjoyed growing older every year,

as it meant more "freedom" and "rights".

But as I am in my last teenage year this year, I kind of feel it.

I get what people mean by getting old is no fun.

As you age, things are some how bound to change.

When you're a kid/teenager, you study study study.

And you complain that it's boring and tough and ko ko/che che/mummy/daddy have it way easier. 

"I can't wait to work and earn my own money so mum and dad won't nag at me for shopping too much."

Sounds familiar?

No?

Okay maybe just me.

Then you go to college & uni!

And assignments study assignments study is what your life is basically about.

Now, cause I just finished college, I've got a little tip.

College is NOT easy.

It's not like how it is in the movies where it's partying and fun fun fun.

Well it can be, but that is if you don't plan on going to uni.

I did my SAM, it was okay/manageable for me, but some of my course mates found it hard.

Whatever it is, work hard.

I kind of regret not working hard enough for SAM.

I worked hard, but I could've worked harder.

Then you graduate and you're out for a job.

And life is hectic.

You'll have it worse off if you hate what you're doing.

Then you'll think, "I wish I was a kid again, all I did was study, it was so easy."

Maybe you'll get hitched, maybe not.

If you do, your own kids will be next.

And it hits you.

You worked your butt off for the past, say 5 years?

And all that is now going to your child.

All your effort, hard work, money, time.

Of course, it's yours, so you decide what you do with it.

But whether you admit it or not, you're only getting a fraction of it.

The big chunk is going to be on your child.

So everyday you go to work, with the tiniest amount of sleep, slaving away from 9 to 5 (if you're lucky),

then going home to your children, fulfilling their wants and needs and you're off to bed.

And you repeat it all over again the next day.

So what is my point?

DO SOMETHING.

While you can, when you can.

Could've ; don't let that be the reason why you don't achieve your goals.

What if ; don't let that be your biggest regret.

Make your life worth while.

You really don't want to spend the 80 years of your life being unhappy

and slaving away at someone else's expense.

To me, life is about being happy.

Call me a optimist or a naive person, but that is what I think life should be.

What about you?

xx.